Stranger to myself

My spirit is a ghost

A life in search of a resting place

Thirsty and weary

Detached from my mind 

But inhibiting my body  

Challenging my feelings 

I stay in limbo 

Trying to find myself

Yet running further away  

How can I find myself 

When I do not know who I am

How do I embrace a stranger

When I do not know myself?

Infinity

So you say you are looking for someone to fulfill you,

But the fact is,

you are looking to find yourself, because in your weakness,you cannot open your own eyes and see yourself whole,

So you look for one whose strength in spirit can project your image;

When you look into their eyes,

You want to see your reflection,

When their heart opens,

You want to see the love they hold for you,

When their arms hold you,

You want to feel how close they need to be with you ,

In their kiss,

You want to feel the depth of their longing,

When you make love,

You want to experience infinity,

Because that is how you see your self

Without a beginning or an end.

When you find the one who fulfills you,

You have found yourself,

your balance,

Your ying or yang; a kindred spirit.

So the first place to begin,

when you are searching for one who fulfill you,

Is to embrace yourself first,

your positive and negative energies,

Then master the forces that will move you forward or hold you back 

from finding yourself.

Catching my breath

I can barley hold myself up

Or keep myself together,

I am raffled,a bag in the wind,

My hope, tossed beyond my reach.

I breath,but cannot feel the wind move through my lungs.

I am awake, yet not living,

tears, they cloud my eyes

and I stumble on my own feet.

this helpless feeling,

as I watch the fading color of a dream, 

I want to speak, with no words to  express my heart,

It is crushed,

A dream crumbles, 

But falls heavy on my head,

With a sense of impending doom 

I hold my breath.

My head, heavy on my shoulders 

needing a break, just to catch my breath  

I breath, but cannot feel wind going through my lungs

I hold my breath

But I need to exhale.

Love finds you

The love that finds you is the kind of love that stays with you,

 lives in you 

and surrounds you.

It does not exhaust your soul 

Because you do not chase after it

It comes to you  

And lays your soul to rest 

A love that lays with you 

And rises with you

It reads your soul 

And answers questions that you have not yet asked 

Because it hears your voice

It understand the rhythm of your heart beat

the kind of friend who can finish what you start and start what you can finish

Yking and yang

A tango of two souls

Dancing to the rhythm that is not composed by another 

The sound of a melody of strings  

Strumed with fingers intertwined

Walking hand in hand 

With the step of one heart

Yet two people 

Hand in hand

Yet left and right

Heart to heart

Yet ying and yang

Three wishes 

I -love - you

A world in four dimensions 

You, I , hope and the universe

Heartbeat

When you have children

Your heart beats outside your body

It has a pulse that skips a beat each time they stumble

It races with each triumphant cry

Your arms are ready to catch them

when the truth of life challenges their naivety and cause them to stumble over their own feet 

When they hurt, your heart bleeds 

When they fall your prayers pick them up

Their laughter are the bells that chime in your heart 

When you have children

You learn to let go of what you want

For what they need

My Happy place

I know a happy place

A quiet place

It begins within

With a Word 

just a whisper

A spark that flickers in my soul

igniting my spirit into a roaring flame

that floats a deflated dream

Like a hot air ballon 

I  rise up

When I look below

I see over the mountains 

And across the valleys

I see my way 

When I look up

my dreams are the stars that light up the darkness

This is my happy place

Where my mind is free 

To express what gives me joy

In my happy place

I do not sit by the phone

I dance to the rhythm of my heart beat

and the one I dance with

tunes into my spirit 

and sings my song

It is abuse

It is not just a slap nor is it just a name

It is abuse

and you should not have to take any

So I get slap in the face

And you are called a name

So I am beaten up with a hand 

And you are beaten down with words

So you have counted a year 

And I have counted thirteen

your pain is not less than mine

When you cry in silence 

And I cry out loud

Your tears are just as salty as mine 

And just as wet

When you dry your eyes 

And mine run down my neck

It is abuse

When sharp words cut your soul

And a hand cuts my flesh

My body has scars 

And your scars are marked on your soul

You do not take in less 

and I do not take in more

Because the heart still breaks the same way and the spirit burns out

You reach out for bread

And you get a stone

I thirst for water

But I drink vinegar

The hunger is the same.